Divorce

[alfie]

We had a Bible study on divorce and re-marriage. The Bible makes it very clear that re-marriage is commiting adultry and yet most of the people who call themselves Christians have been divorced and re-married.

Being single this really gets my ire because I am expected to never have sex out side of marriage or pro-create out-side of marriage.

[Cepha]

I absolutely agree with you 101% Alfie.

People get divorced like their changing socks or something. They have no respect for the institution of Marriage (what we Catholics consider a Sacrament...something holy).

[CatholicCrusader]

.

From Catholic.com
www.catholic.com/library/Permanence_of_Matrimony.asp

When Jesus came, he elevated matrimony to the same status it had originally possessed between Adam and Eve—the status of a sacrament. Thus, any valid marriage between two baptized people is a sacramental marriage and, once consummated, cannot be dissolved. Jesus, therefore, taught that if anyone so married divorces and remarries, that person is living in perpetual adultery, a state of mortal sin.

He said, "Every one who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery" (Luke 16:18; cf. Mark 10:11–12).

Paul was equally insistent on this fact, declaring, "Thus a married woman is bound by law to her husband as long as he lives. . . . Accordingly, she will be called an adulteress if she lives with another man while her husband is alive" (Rom. 7:2–3).

This applied, of course, only to sacramental marriages—those between baptized people. For marriages involving an unbaptized party, a different rule applied (1 Cor. 7:12–15).

In the midst of the Greco-Roman culture, which allowed for easy divorce and remarriage, the early Church Fathers proclaimed Christ’s teaching on the indissolubility of marriage—just as the Catholic Church does today in our modern, secular, easy-divorce culture (cf. Catechism of the Catholic Church 1614–1615). Other denominations have modified their teachings to accommodate the pro-divorce ethos that dominates modern culture, but the Catholic Church preserves the teaching of Jesus and the early Christians.

While their ex-spouses are alive, the only time that a baptized couple can remarry after divorce is when a valid sacramental marriage never existed in the first place. For example, for a marriage to be contracted, the two parties must exchange valid matrimonial consent. If they do not, the marriage is null. If the competent authority (a diocesan marriage tribunal) establishes this fact, a decree of nullity (commonly called an annulment) can be granted, and the parties are free to remarry (CCC 1629). In this case there is no divorce followed by remarriage in God’s eyes because there was no marriage before God in the first place, merely a marriage in the eyes of men.

If, however, the parties are genuinely and sacramentally married, then, while in some cases there may be good reasons for them to live apart and even to obtain a legal separation, in God’s eyes they are not free to remarry (CCC 1649).

This is not a commandment of men, but one that comes directly from Jesus Christ. As Paul said, "To the married I give charge, not I but the Lord, that the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, let her remain single or else be reconciled to her husband)—and that the husband should not divorce his wife" (1 Cor. 7:10-11).

Fortunately, God will ensure that the sacramentally married have the grace necessary to live out their marriage vows and either stay married or live continently. The sacrament of matrimony itself gives this grace. Whenever we face a trial, God ensures that we will have the grace we need. As Paul elsewhere says, "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with the temptation will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it" (1 Cor. 10:13).

As the following quotations from the early Church Fathers illustrate, they also recognized the seriousness of Christ’s teaching regarding the indissolubility of marriage.

To read the early fathers' quotes, go here: www.catholic.com/library/Permanence_of_Matrimony.asp

[teresarios]

Alfie,

I agree with you. Marriage is permanent. A real, true Christian marriage can never be dissolved. Even if someone gets a civil divorce, they aren't free to remarry, and they aren't separated in God's eyes, only in the eyes of civil law.

Sometimes civil divorce is necessary, especially if one of the spouses is abusive, or for custody issues, etc. But if a Christian gets a civil divorce and then "remarries" they may be "married" according to civil law, but they are still married to their first spouse and are basically just in a civilly approved affair.

I don't know how Protestants deal with these issues because they tend to see no difference between marriage in the eyes of the law and a Christian marriage.

Catholics have a completely different view of marriage. There is no such thing as "REMarriage" in the Catholic Church because someone who was truly married can't marry another person (unless the spouse dies, or in a very few very specific cases).
However, there may be Catholics who have been civilly divorced who will get married in the Catholic Church, but ONLY because their first "marriage" was proven to be invalid. So, in the eyes of the law, they were married, but to God, they were not, so they are free to marry. There are many different things that could make a "marriage" invalid, but a few examples would be a "shotgun" wedding, (someone was so pressured or forced to marry that they were not doing it of their own free will) or if someone had a psychological problem that made them incapable of understanding or fulfilling their vows, or if someone got married just to get a "green card" etc.